Sunday, June 25, 2006

Interesting Post About Tucker Max And His Followers

I discovered the following post about Tucker MAx and his mindless followers posted in the comments section for this article about Tucker Max from BlaggBlog. I don't even know who most of these people are. I did see a video of a fight between Cloud Starchaser and KungFu Mike, and Cloud fought KungFu to a draw and might have gotten the upper hand if KungFu's chubby friend hadn't intervened.

The whole Tucker Max phenomenon is a bunch of self promotion, hype, and alot of stupid tools, Tucker included. Ill admit some of his insults are good, but you have to wonder how many he actually came up with on the spot. His stories are filled with exaggeration. Ive been trolling his friends blogs, ripping the whole clique a new one. The whole "Tucker Max" clique is a bunch of asskissing retards following a no talent hack.

Tucker Max- is quickly on his way to becoming a F-list has been. Odds of him even doing a pilot for a show are now 1000 to 1. Although he wont admit it. Very big shit talker. Sassy.Like most shit talkers he cant back it up himself. He has to recruit an army of mindless retards eager to belong somewhere to do his bidding. Its no coincidence that many of his fans are or were in the military. A word of Advice, Tucker, no ones gonna be interested in seeing a 35 year old acting like a spoiled, drunken frat boy. Good Luck in the Future.

TheBunny- dumb, masochistic,average looking dyke/bisexual.OOOOHHH!! How special!!! And how original. Im so interested in her vapid insights... What do ya know, she's a huge fan of Montell Jordan. Why does this not suprise me?? Maybe if I kiss enough ass, I can get a crack at her worn out cunt. Maybe she'll bring another average looking,stretched out cunt from the obselete "Chicago Bomb Squad" and then we can have a mechanical 3-way, and feel "real cool" Claim to fame: dated F-list celeb Tucker Max. Can you get more pathetic??

Drunkasaurus Rex aka "DRex"- The stupid nickname should be an obvious warning sign to anyone. "Douchebag Over Here!!" Another Tucker Max idolizer/dicksucker/groupie this tool tries his best to imitate the talentless F-list hack in lifestyle,outlook and writing. And even though its hard to do, he manages to write worse than Tucker.

Luke Heidelberger- Goober Extraordinaire. Had a pic of a girls ass and a bottle of crisco oil photoshopped next to it, as his icon. "Up to the elbows" was his caption under the pic. Need I say more?

Kung Fu Mike- Looks fairly tough in pics, but video shows otherwise. Comes off as a short, immature, geeky,out of shape slacker with a bad haircut. His voice is unbeliveably nasal, and he is easily bullied by Tucker into starting fights he doesnt ant. Fought to a draw against out of shape fruitcake Cloud Starchaser. To top it all off, he sees himself as some great comedic talent, when its obvious he is a mediocre, borderline hack that uses tired unoriginal cliches, such as dressing up as a retard. LOL! This guy just keeps the kneeslappers coming! Watch out Gallagher!!! Yet his fan base in the Tucker Max community is widespread.

Hmmm. Makes you wonder...

its SoylentGreen- "Hey, I look like a bulked up reject from the WWF turned rent-a-cop. But I have a military background(surprise!) and consider myself a pretty macho guy overall. I really try, you know. I own all kinds of guns MAXXESMAMA
| 01.17.06 - 6:50 pm | #

33 comments:

Cloud Starchaser said...

The fat guy in the fight video was Slarvey, another guy from the Tucker Max Message Board who is also Tucker Max's lawyer.

Anonymous said...

It looks like you got your ass kicked to me. Did you even manage to score a single punch, I didn't see one?

Cloud Starchaser said...

Whether you win or lose a fight is irrelevant, all that matters is that you fight on the side of justice.

KungFu Mike is a rude prick who insults girls who don't want to talk to him and is apparently proud of it.

Thus he lost the fight as he loses in life.

You cannot win if you do not fight on the side of truth.

Even if you think he got the upper hand physically, he still lost since you can never win if you are wrong.

Anonymous said...

Whatever, Justin. If you want to show up your object of desire, find the feed of his appearance on Opie & Anthony this morning. Max was promoting it on his blog, then deleted all reference to it on his messageboard. Guess it didn't go all that well.

Cockly McBeefwell said...

Cloud, why did you remove the video from YouTube? You should at least post in on your website.

It looked like a draw to me. If you would have punched KungFu in the head when you had him on the ground in a headlock you would have won the fight.

Cockly McBeefwell said...

You had the upper hand here until Slarvey intervened:

http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/523/754/400/fight1.jpg

Cloud Starchaser said...

The video is on my website, go to http://tuckermax.heroicdestinysquad.com/

The YouTube post was an upload of the video by someone else I don't know and hadn't given permission to which is a violation of copyright laws.

All the videos are the copyrighted work of Heroic Destiny Squad, this is a company, not just a website for fun.

Cloud Starchaser said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Cloud Starchaser said...

And what's with the dude above referring to me as Justin?

My name is Cloud, it's my legal name and all now.

For some reason people don't seem to understand that you can change your name and once you change your name, your name is no longer your old one.

Is this really such a hard concept to understand?

Anonymous said...

for someone who hates tucker max so much you really seem to have a lot of time on your hands checking out not only his, but everybody elses sites involving him... im not really an expert, but you seem envious..

Cockly McBeefwell said...

Hey anonoymous, nice work Sherlock. You're right, if I critize Tucker, that must mean I am jealous of him. That's that dumbest reasoning I've ever heard. So if you say "Osama Bin Laden is an asshole," according to your logic that would mean that you love Osama Bin Laden.

I just think he's a loser who thinks he's hot shit but in reality is an alcoholic and unemployed tool.

By the way, the two most recent posts were my first new posts in over two months.

Anonymous said...

Whether you win or lose a fight is irrelevant, all that matters is that you fight on the side of justice...Thus he lost the fight as he loses in life.

That's a pretty dumb way to do it - you could have just claimed your victory without fighting and spared yourself an ass-kicking.

You should definitely have tried to hit him back at some point though, just to make sure he knew he'd lost.

Anonymous said...

Justin, since you are poor now, this website is your best chance to make some money. I think an anti-Tucker site could do some business. Get the O&A feed.

Anonymous said...

Fine Justin/Cockly, I found the link:

http://wackbag.com/showthread.php?t=47436

Cockly McBeefwell said...

Hey, thanks for the link to the Opie & Anthony message boards. Tucker isn't getting much love over there. I didn't realize he was on the Opie & Anthony Show. Do you have a link to the show? That would be awesome to hear him called out on his bullshit.

Anonymous said...

I've been looking for a link of the show, or at least a recap, but no luck so far. Would love to hear it.

Cloud Starchaser said...

I had him on the ground in a headlock but his fat friend intervened. I would have won if I wasn't double teamed.

Anonymous said...

The fat guy wearing brown didn't do shit, you let the smaller guy get out of the headlock, after that you were fucked. Why didn't you hit him when you had a chance?

Good job winning doesn't matter anyway, like you said.

Anonymous said...

FOUND IT! Go to www.foundrymusic.com and click on the Opie and Anthony link. Tucker gets OWNED by O&A with a stupid broken microphone gimmick. It's as bad as Justin's whipping at the hands of KungFu Mike. I'm actually a Tucker fan, but this one is bad. He gets called on the authenticity of his stories.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous again. You might post that video here and youtube and add a tag to this blog saying something like banned tucker max video.

Cockly McBeefwell said...

Thanks. I watched the two videos. Max looked kind of pissed when they called him on his bullshit, and the "broken microphone" stunt was pretty funny. Max looked like he was ready to cry by the end of the interview.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous again. Those Opie & Anthony guys are relentless. They've already updated Tucker's Wikipedia entry:

"On June 27, 2006, Tucker appeared on the Opie and Anthony show on XM Satellite Radio[37]. After telling his "Tucker Tries Butt-Sex" story,[38] the interview quickly went sour. Upon further questioning, Max was unable to validate his story with the inability to be able to produce the tape in question, claiming that the cameraman vomited on it, thus destoying the tape. Max was also unable to produce a police report involving another woman's car and a parking mishap that resulted in a supposed collision with a donut shop. Opie and Anthony then led an unsuspecting Max into believing that his headphones had broken. While Max's headphones were off, Anthony told the audience that Tucker Max was a full of it, and called bravo sierra. The interview ended with allegations of Tucker being called a "liar" and comparisons to author James Frey. When leaving the studio, Opie allegedly threw his book at a window and tore it up.[citation needed] Max left the building giving poor Erock (show gopher) the middle finger. Tucker has since removed all mentions of this appearance on his website."

Anonymous said...

Tucker Max flew away like a fairy. Like that's a suprise. Now that the video is out, he'll probably shy away from book tours. He's not 6' like he claims, and he has the narrow shoulders and pot belly of a nerd.

As to Kung Fu Mike, if I were him I'd change my name to Mini Skirt Mike. He's one of those dime-a-dozen Internet losers who thinks that he is a martial arts master. In reality he's just a punk who types big at a remote keyboard.

Coop said...

Leave TheBunny out of this. Yes, she dated Tucker Max, but we all make mistakes.

Her writing is in a totally different category to Tucker's. She's not a self proclaimed 'asshole' and she doesn't get her kicks from getting black out drunk and being a fuck wit.

She just writes about her life, just like every other blogger. I'm sure if people took the time to read any of her stuff, they'd realise this.

Also, after reading this blog and then comparing it to Tucker's official website, I have to say I'm now a little doubtful as to whether Tucker has done most the things he claims to have done. Most of the things he wrote about, I knew were exaggerated. But then there are things like that girl tattooing Tucker's name to her hip. You can't deny that happened, there was proof. But other stories are hard to believe at times.

I’m not here to stir more shit, as clearly there are enough people doing that, all I wanted to say was that TheBunny is by far a better blog then Tucker’s. To hate her because she’s associated with Tucker Max and his bullshit is weak.

Anonymous said...

Tucker Max is a douchebag. It's true.

I believe it, you say it - HE even says it.

Here's the thing: he's a douchebag who keeps trying, and if at first he doesn't succeed, he lowers his expectations and/or keeps trying until he does succeed - even if all he's succeeded at is making a few bucks, screwing drunk chicks, and telling self-aggrandizing lies/stories.

The point is this: Tucker Max is a crappy human being - and is very clear about this. If you treat his stories as anything but entertainment, you have a screw loose - a point I've seen him make repeatedly. More to the point is this: he has neither power nor authority - if he's lying, it doesn't matter. When Fox News lies people have a tendency to die. When political leaders at home and abroad lie - people die.

Tucker Max is lying through his teeth most of the time, and it's funny enough that people pay him for it. That's OK. He's an asshole who makes money by telling people how much of an asshole he is.

You have to realize that you can just let go of it. Really. And the best part, the part that puts a smile on *my* face is that he *enjoys* having people think he's an asshole. Because he IS an asshole, and he enjoys it.

The Bunny said...

"TheBunny- dumb, masochistic,average looking dyke/bisexual.OOOOHHH!! How special!!! And how original. Im so interested in her vapid insights... What do ya know, she's a huge fan of Montell Jordan. Why does this not suprise me?? Maybe if I kiss enough ass, I can get a crack at her worn out cunt. Maybe she'll bring another average looking,stretched out cunt from the obselete "Chicago Bomb Squad" and then we can have a mechanical 3-way, and feel "real cool" Claim to fame: dated F-list celeb Tucker Max. Can you get more pathetic??"

Can I clear a few things up here, kids? Thanks.

Last time I checked, one cannot have a genius IQ and be dumb. Just saying. I am definitely average looking. Average as hell. I do not like Montell Jordan. This person read my blog during the several-month-long period my sister took it over. But she's pretty fun and funny so I don't know what his problem is. There's no crack at my worn out cunt in his future. Not unless his girlfriend is hot. I've hung out with Zach Albarran twice, and he is part of the "Chicago Bomb Squad," but other than that I've never associated. They seem like fun and lovely people, though. I don't claim to be famous at all, but I did indeed have sexual relations with Tucker Max because we dated for quite some time. I suppose if you think I'm pathetic, that's cool. I try not to call people I don't even know pathetic, but whatev.

In closing, I post regularly on the web because I'm a pretty decent writer with a book deal. A little research would have cleared that up.

All the best, peeps. On with the hate...

The Bunny said...

Also, Mr. McBeefWell, you've got quite a lot of energy and vigor. Jeez. You should use your powers for good or something. I bet you'd make an excellent pop culture blogger.

Sydney Carton said...

I take exception to the "military guys are idiots logic" explaining how some of his fans are military guys. As you are probably well aware, the military's average level of education is far higher than the civilian population at large.

As a military guy, I knew his shit was at least 90% bullshit, b/c as a guy, ONLY 10% OF A STORY HAS TO BE TRUE. Only an idiot would assume that some sally with daddy issues could come up with all of that shit on the spot.

Further, I have met many people (military and otherwise) who have actually pulled the shit he claims to have, and are far more eloquent writers; they just have better things to do with themselves then verbally fellate their number one fan, themselves.

I've read his book, and it is entertaining. But i would never hang out with this poseur who abandoned his worthwhile friends for yes men and lapdog douche rockets. B/c of this innate ability to operate w/o a spine, I'd say he has a solid future in politics. The question is, will he be a George Bush or John Kerry?

Since he hates his dad and has to publish made up shit about himself, I'd say John Kerry. What a douche. Or is it turd sandwich?

Anonymous said...

WTF why are you jagging on the military you dumb mother fucker? you think that shit is true? TM doesn't know real military dudes, he's just a bitch and don't say we're mindless or brain washed or some conspiracy nonsense either.

Cassandra BANNER said...

I don't think acting rash and being angry is a way to get a point across; I will try not to. This post states military personel and ex-military personel form most of his fans. I won't say I know if it's true or not. I don't know. Enlisting in the military can be a smart career; I don't think we should look down on our servicemen. I think society may say it too often to the extent that it sounds corny, but the servicemen DO sacrifice their time, life, etc. I didn't finish the reading the post. I read another sentence I didn't agree with. The sentence can be summed up. It basically stated Tucker Max has no intention of changing. He has stated more than one time (I don't remember his exact words) if he was still doing this...in his forties....(basically when he got older in age) then something is wrong. He has stated he doesn't want to do what he's doing now the rest of his life. You can find the proof in interviews with Tucker Max. I understand he's a human being. We say words and have conversations that might not have meaning...THE NEXT DAY....but I don't think he said those words "in passing". I don't think I have authority to judge Tucker's life. I think I'll "sit on the bench" and watch the game. The books he writes entertains me.

Sharlot E. said...

If any of the haters here actually took a moment to sit down and write about the funny crap that has happened in your life, you wouldn't be so jealous that Tucker Max wrote about his.

Sharlot E. said...

If any of the haters here actually took a moment to sit down and write about the funny crap that has happened in your life, you wouldn't be so jealous that Tucker Max wrote about his.

Sharlot E. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.